I recently wrote a blog post on the bizarre subject of people feeling embarrassed for being attracted to wheelchair-users, as if it’s akin to finding a child or corpse attractive. I have been countlessly taken aback by backhanded compliments since my spinal cord injury stemming from this. Eg: “So and so found you hot, BUT he was too embarrassed to say so…to anybody.”
*Sigh* Having a SCI can be way too complicated sometimes. Read the entirety of my thoughts on this subject on Easystand – “Embarrassed for Being Attracted to a Disabled Person?”
I use a wheelchair 24/7. I tend to be attracted mainly to spina bifida and polio females. Am I, in your opinion, a ‘dev’?
Not if you’re a wheelchair-user. Just my opinion 🙂 I think it’s more of a comfort thing, not a “I want to bone her for her emaciated legs OMG” thing.
This is so common. I have had so many guys like me only to pull away after their friends give them a hard time about dating me. The factor at work here is society’s beauty standard which demands that men toe the line regarding the type of women it’s acceptable to openly date. If they date women who fall outside of that beauty standard then they’re weird, perverted or have a fetish. Our culture conditions men to be very self conscious about the ‘appearance’ of those they openly date and will punish them through ridicule and social ostracism when they date outside that spectrum. The fact is that men are attracted to a wide range of women. Social pressure to conform doesn’t prevent that atrraction, it only makes them feel ashamed about it. I hate it when a guy will come on to me in private but refuse to make eye contact with me in public. BTW, I’m a female, C7 quad.
Hey Chloe. I’m a male c5 quad but I understand what you are going through completely. I feel like women see me as unable to provide and I will just slow them down from their active, outdoorsy, spontaneous lifestyle.