After Tori, a paraplegic, and her boyfriend broke up, he just had to send the super mean email.
I’ve been seeing an able-bodied guy who had never been around a wheelchair before, and he never felt comfortable around me. We recently stopped seeing each other, but he wrote this to me in my inbox on Facebook: “It’s sort of interesting that you ‘paint yourself with the same brush that able-bodied people do: Not being able to compete with an able-bodied woman for a man’s affections. I know that the odds are more in favor of you ‘being dumped’ due to your disability playing a role in 1) your access to members of the other sex AND 2) the fact that your pool of potential partners is a lot smaller than the pool I can choose from….due again to ‘how people are conditioned to think about relationships with people with disabilities versus those with able-bodied people.'”
I just don’t know, I feel he’s saying I try to be like ABs, but can’t?! Or that I try to act as if I’m not disabled, but there is no way I could compete with an AB woman for a man’s affections. He’s someone I was seeing for a little while, now we’re not. This was written yesterday.
I know that’s the truth, but he was saying it to hurt me. Tiff, how do you take this?
Wow, I was getting mad reading this. I think every disabled woman out there can relate to this on some level. And the fact that he sent this unwarranted after the break-up was complete is just….ick.
Don’t waste your time communicating with this guy any longer. Any douche who points out the obvious is not only boring and hurtful, but selfish, somehow thinking by saying those things makes him feel better for dumping you. Don’t let him hurt you any longer.
Reply to him and say: “My disability is also a great people-filter, helping point me in the direction of evolved humans who see love and beauty before disability. Thank you for not wasting my time any longer. We will all be dead before we know it, you as well, and I’d rather spend my precious time with people who appreciate my priceless qualities. Farewell.”
Then block him.
Hope I’ve helped!
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